Okay. Here is the second part. If you wanna read it, pull on your waders. I've got one last subject on my mind (the longest one), and then I'll call it quits. A lady who comes into the gym where I work is from England. She read my letter that my boss had let me put out, and was highly offended at me. I tried to avoid confrontation, but, well, my lovely and amazing heavenly Father doesn't allow me to run from much. So. Despite my intent, I had to got to talk to her. I was feeling emotional knowing that she was upset with me as it was, and when she asked to talk to me when I came out of my hiding place. (aka the restroom.) I gathered myself together (not wanting to start out our meeting with tears) and went out to the lobby.
I asked her what was up, and she vented to me (and . . . sorta at me.) The problem was, I stated in my letter a statistic that only 3% of Europe regularly attends a Christian church. She felt that I was "gullible", and that I was not speaking the truth. She asked me why I thought the American way was any better than the European way, and why I wanted to go forcing people to change. I tried to explain to her that I didn't, but I could tell she was upset and needed to talk. I let her talk it out.
She told me that life was not so black and white, and that hopefully good works would help her life to go well. (basically, she told me she believes in Karma. I'm nice to you, you're nice to me) She also asked me why we felt it was so important to proselytize (sp?) and tell people that they were going to go to hell? "Nobody even knows if it exists, because nobody's been there and come back." She told me the story of a 6 year old (from a specific religious denomination), who asked her 9 year old if he believed in God. When the 9 year old said no, the 6 year old "Christian" boy told him he was going to Hell. The kid (6 y.o.) was only saying what he had presumably heard his parents say to people.
It really bothered me. Maybe even more than the actual scenario with the letter. She automatically thought that being a Christian meant I was standing on street corners, shoving Jesus down peoples' throats. Now, I am prepared for that sort of thing when I'm on the trip. I was not, however, emotionally prepared for that after about 5 hours of sleep and a 5 am shift. She even told me that Christianity should be about caring and loving on people, not "forcing them to believe the same as me". I almost cried. I told her that I totally agreed, and that my church believed that way.
I just. . . . it hurts me. It hurts me that that is how people may see me, just because of my "label'. I am a Christian, but I most certainly do not believe in shoving Jesus down people's throats, or damning them to Hell because they haven't accepted Jesus. . . YET!
The other thing that started to bother me was, did I do the right thing? I guess by some people's standards, I had a great opportunity to witness. On the other hand, wouldn't that prove her right? So instead, I nodded and looked apologetic, and I tried to say what God would want her to hear. Am I a bad Christian for not jumping on her statements about "life not being black and white" and "hell not being for sure"? Am I a bad Christ-Follower for not having all the right scriptures to tell her I was wrong? Or did I do the right thing? Was the way I did it grace with truth? I just don't know. I pray that God uses what I said to touch her in some way, and that my life will be an example to her that not all Christians are condemning.
The outcome between her and I was that she told me after really chatting with me she could tell I didn't mean to be offensive, and that I was young and black and white. She told me that I had settled her mind, and I told her that I would rewrite my letter. I just. . . I'm so confused. Eh, well, if you got through that, I apologize for all the mud and muck. I love you all dearly.
<3
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